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QUOTE Tommy: Wait just a sec Ted, you suppose a man buy's a box marked guranteed because he wants to feel all warm inside, am I right? Ted: it makes a man feel good, Tommy: sure, why wouldn't it, hell if you left it under your pillow at night, the guranteed fairly might leave you a quarter, am I right Ted? Ted: whats your point, Tommy: Well what I'm trying to say is how do you know this fairly isn't a crazy glue sniffer, build a model airplane he says well we're not buying it. He snuck into your house one time, that's all it takes, next thing you know your daughter's knocked up and there's money missing off your dresser, I've seen it a hundred times Ted: What's your point? Tommy: What I'm trying to say is when you buy a box marked guranteed, all your getting is a guranteed piece of shit. Hey if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guranteed, I will, I have spare time. But for your daughter's sake, for your company's sake, you might wanna buy a quality product from me. Ted: Alright I'll buy it Tommy: Well thats, WHAT!?
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MOVIE TITLE Tommy Boy - 1995